I'll keep repeating this, both for your benefit and for my own.

I take it you have created your personal boundaries at this point. You did? Good. You didn't?? 

Drop everything and create them NOW. It's paramount to your health and to the health of your writing. 

Simply write down a list of things you don't want other people to do to you. Come join our open Discord if you haven't already, and send me a private message there. I'll share my list with you. Or email me. Only Discord is faster, I check it daily, as opposed to email.

People will come at you every day, demanding things of you, and not always aware of crossing your boundaries. You'll notice it's people whose boundaries have been crossed as well who tend to do the same (I know, because I've done it to others countless times before I even understood what I'm doing—and I'm still learning to get better).

At any point this happens, if you're unsure what to do, yet in your gut you feel the beginning of pain, of fear, of discomfort, WALK AWAY.

I know it's easy to say and not easy to do. Try. We mostly talk in the online world now. Simply stop talking to the person. Close your browser. Don't answer your email. Hang up your phone. And if meeting in person, turn around and walk away. 

Yes, it may seem rude at first. Trust me, you need it, and it's not rude—it's you taking care of YOU. 

Let time pass. Then, when your emotions quiet, revisit the situation and see what has set you off. What boundary has been crossed? Bold it in your daily document and focus on strengthening it by removing yourself from the situations that can trigger you. 

Later, if you need to, you can apologize to the person. Most of the time, you don't even need to apologize. With enough time they'll forget and move on.

Your writing will thank you for this. As will your creative self. 

Illustration by Carson Ellis